The Youth Must Pass the Test of Purity
A few female students came to see me today and told me, "Geronda, pray so that we may pass our exams." I said, "I will pray that you pass your purity exams". This is the most important thing. Everything else falls into place after that." It was the right thing to say, wasn’t’ it? There’s no greater sight than that of modesty and purity in the faces of young people today! No greater sight!
Some traumatized young women come to see me. They live unruly lives with young men and they don’t realize that these men do not have good intentions and, of course, they end up getting hurt. "What must I do, Father?" they ask. "The tavern owner," I replied, "may have the drunkard as a friend, but he will never accept him as his son-in-law. Stop having relations. If the man really loves you, he will appreciate it; if he leaves you, you will know that he doesn’t love you and this way you will not be wasting your time."
The cunning devil takes advantage of young people, who, on top of everything else, have to deal with the rebellion of their flesh, and he tries to destroy them during this difficult period of their life, when the mind is not yet mature, the experience is missing and their spiritual reserves are almost non-existent. This is why, during this critical period, young people must always seek the advice of their elders, so that they may not slip down the sweet secular slope, which will only fill their soul with anxiety and separate it eternally from God.
I know that a physiologically healthy young person cannot easily attain a spiritual state where there is neither male nor female. This is why the Spiritual Fathers recommend that young men and women, no matter how spiritual they may be, should not spend time together; at their age, problems will naturally arise and then temptation will step in and take advantage of their youth. It is better for a young man or a young woman to bear this heavy cross and risk being considered a fool by the opposite sex for his or her spiritual prudence and innocence. This heavy cross hides all the power and wisdom of God, making a young man stronger than Sampson and wiser than Solomon. Better, then, that he walk down the street praying rather than looking left and right, even if relatives may misunderstand him and think that he snubbed them by not speaking with them. Otherwise, if he walks looking around with curiosity, he may get in trouble or get misunderstood by lay people who always harbour suspicious thoughts. It’s a thousand times better to leave Church right away, after Liturgy, like a lone animal, and keep his spiritual good sense and whatever he learned intact, rather than stay around and stare at fancy furs or ties, and become spiritually agitated as the enemy starts scratching at his heart.
It is true, unfortunately, that there is so much filth in this world that no matter what path the soul that desires purity may follow, it will get soiled. The difference is that God will not make the same demands on a Christian who wishes to remain pure today that He made in the past. Purity requires nerves of steel; a young man must try every means to resist temptation, and he will surely have Christ’s help. When divine eros is kindled in his heart, the burning is such that every other desire and unseemly picture will be burned out. When this divine fire is burning in us, we experience pleasures so divine that all other pleasures pale in comparison. When we taste heavenly manna, wild carobs will mean nothing to us. This is why we should hold fast to the steering wheel, make the sign of the cross and not be afraid. After every little struggle, heavenly delights follow. If we are brave when temptation comes, God and the Panaghia will help miraculously.
The Elder Augustinos had told me the following story. When he was a young novice, he lived in a Monastery in his native Russia. Most of the Fathers there were old and so they would use him for various chores such as helping a Monastery employee with fishing, the Monastery’s main means of support. One day the daughter of that employee came and asked her father to return home for an emergency and she stayed to help in his place. But the poor girl was seized by temptation, and without thinking, came on the novice with sinful intentions. Antonios, this was his name when he was in the world, was taken aback because everything happened so suddenly. He crossed himself and said, "My Christ, I’d rather drown than sin!" and plunged into the deep river. But the Good Lord, seeing the heroism of this chaste young man, who acted like Saint Martinianos in order to remain chaste, kept him afloat and completely dry! "You see," he explained to me, "I jumped head first into the river and I still cannot figure out how I found myself standing up with my clothes dry!" At that moment, he had felt an internal peace and inexpressible sweetness that made every sinful thought and carnal desire caused by the indecent gestures of the young woman go away. When she saw Antonios standing up on the water, she was overcome by repentance and started weeping, deeply moved by this great miracle.
Christ does not require big things from us to help us in our struggle. He expects very little, a tiny bit. A young man was telling me that he went to Patmos to worship and fell into temptation’s trap. A female tourist jumped on him and hugged him while he was walking. He pushed her away saying, "My Christ I have come for worship not for love" and he went away. That same night in his hotel room, during prayer, he saw Christ immersed in Uncreated Light. Do you see the reward he received for that one push? Others strive for years in the ascetic life and may never be blessed with something like that. And he saw Jesus Christ only because he resisted temptation. And this experience, naturally, made him stronger spiritually. Later on, he saw Saint Marcella, Saint Raphael, and Saint George more than once. One day, he came and told me "Father, say a prayer for me so that I may see Saint George again and be consoled. I cannot find any consolation in this world!" And then you see where other young people end up.
A young man with his elderly uncle came to the Kalyvi once and told me, "Pray for a young girl who broke her spine in an accident. Her father fell asleep at the wheel, killing himself and injuring her. Let me show you a picture of her." "It’s not necessary", I said. He insisted and they showed me the picture of a girl who was lying down and two men were embracing her. "Who is this young man?" I asked. "A friend" he answered. "Will he marry her?" "No, they are just friends," he replied. "Don’t hold it against them, Father," the uncle told me, "that’s how young people are today." "I will pray," I thought to myself, "but she does not just need her spine to be straightened out, her mind also needs correction and so does yours, you hopeless man." Where is the respect? His uncle should have told him off. And they were supposedly spiritual people. It is so sad to have spiritual guidance and still be in such a state of spiritual confusion! Even if he intended to marry her, there was no reason for her to be stretched out between the two men, and for the man to be showing me the picture. It never crossed his mind that what he was doing was wrong. I am not bothered by the picture, but it is still not right. What sort of family will these young people have? May God help them come to their senses!
In the old days, young women would sacrifice everything to keep their chastity! I remember, during the war against Italy, they had drafted some villagers and their animals, and they got trapped on a hill by heavy snowfall. The men gathered under the snow, covered spruce trees and made some shelters using spruce branches to protect themselves. The women were forced to seek protection from their fellow villagers, people they knew. Two of them, one young, one elderly, from a faraway village, had to enter one of these shelters. Now, unfortunately, there are those faithless cowards for whom even a war will not make a difference. They have no feelings whatsoever for their fellow human being, who may die or get injured; if they get the chance, they will do their best to sin, because they are afraid that they may get killed and try to use all the time they have to have fun. When in danger, people should repent.
One of these men, who had sin rather than repentance in his mind, was harassing the young woman so much that she was forced to leave the group. She preferred to freeze to death from the cold rather than lose her chastity. When the elderly woman saw that her young companion had left the shelter, she followed her tracks and found her, thirty minutes away, under a small shed, in a Chapel dedicated to Saint John the Forerunner. You see how Saint John the Baptist cared about this honest woman and led her to his Chapel which she never knew it existed! And guess what else the Saint did! He appeared to a soldier in his sleep and told him to go to his Chapel as soon as possible.
So the soldier got up in the middle of the snow-lit night and headed to the Chapel; he had a rough idea where it was. When he got there, he saw the two women stuck in the snow up to their knees, blue in the face and frozen from the cold. He immediately opened the Chapel and they all entered and felt better. The soldier had nothing else to offer them, besides a scarf for the old lady and a pair of gloves which he told them to share, so that they could warm first one hand and then the other. They then told him about the temptation they had confronted. "Why," the soldier asked the young woman, "did you decide to leave in the middle of the night, with all this snow and head to an unknown place?" And she replied, "I did all that I could do for my part, and I was convinced that Christ would take care of the rest." Feeling their pain and trying to console them, the soldier said spontaneously, "Your troubles are over, tomorrow you will be home." These words made them happy and they felt even warmer. Sure enough, the Battalion of Mountain Transports opened the road and, in the morning, military trucks came, and the poor women were taken home. It is Greek women like them, vested in divine Grace – rather than stripped of clothes and divine Grace alike – who deserve our praise and admiration. Later, that beast – may God forgive me for this word – told the Commander that a certain soldier had broken the Chapel’s door and put mules inside! The Commander replied, "I don’t believe the man you accuse would do such a thing." In the end, he was sent to prison.
– Geronda, it seems that people who want to destroy society, have seized upon its foundation, its roots, our young people, and have destroyed them.
– There is no way that they will succeed. Evil self-destructs. In Russia, after the revolution, they had destroyed everything and look what is happening now, after three generations! God will not allow it. And He will not judge the sins of today’s youth as strictly as He will judge the sins of our generation.
– Geronda, how come some young men and women who lead secular lives give very good answers to questions of faith?
– These young people had good intentions but were not able to apply the brakes on themselves at the right time and so they were swept along. That is why they give the right answers. What I mean to say is that someone, for example, wants to follow a particular path in life; he wants to go in that direction, but he finds it hard to follow. And when he sees another who succeeds, he has great respect for him. God will not abandon those who want the good, because they lack malice. The time will come when they will find the strength to follow the right path.
– Geronda, how should we approach young people who have gone astray?
– Love is the answer. Where there is true and noble love, young people will sense it; they will be informed right away and feel disarmed. Young men, who come to my Kalyvi, come from all walks of life, with all kinds of problems. I welcome them, I give them a treat, we start a conversation and soon enough we become friends. They open their heart to me and accept the love I give them. Among them are some who are so deprived of love! Poor souls, they are thirsty for it! You can tell right away those who have never felt a mother’s or father’s love. If you care for them, if they sense your love, they forget all their problems, even their drug use, all their ills disappear, they stop getting in trouble and end up coming to the Holy Mountain as pious pilgrims. You see, they somehow come to sense God’s love. And I see in them such nobility that it breaks my heart. They refuse financial aid, even though they need it so much, and get a job during the day to make ends meet, and go to school at night. They deserve all the help they can get. Near the New Train Station, in Thessaloniki, some of these young people, men and women, will pull their resources together, and stay under the same roof. You could find as many as fifteen living in one apartment. Many of them come from broken homes. Some of them will steal to make ends meet, but others have philotimo and will not do it. For years, I have been telling many people to approach them, to help them. I had asked for a Church to be built nearby so that they can gather there and have a shelter. Now they have built a small Chapel dedicated to the Apostle and Deacon Philip, the protector of railway workers.
What I have come to realize is that; if we don’t take advantage of the opportunities offered to us when we are young, the devil will exploit this situation. Don’t we have the saying "Strike while the iron is hot"? When ironsmiths wanted to join two pieces of iron together – this was before modern welding – they would put the iron in the fire, pour hot water and borax on it, and then, the moment they removed it, while still spewing sparks, they would join it to another piece. But this would not work, if the iron got cold. It’s the same thing with a young person. When opportunities present themselves and he shows no interest, he will concern himself with other people, judging them, criticizing their ways, and thus slowly losing the Grace of God. But if he is full of divine fervour, he will prosper. This is why parents should help their children as much as they can when they are still young. Children are like empty cassette tapes. If we fill them with Christ, they will stay close to Him forever. If we don’t, it will be easier for them to go astray when they become older. But if we help them when they are young, even if they later stray a bit, they will eventually come to their senses. Wood soaked in oil does not rot. Youth soaked in the "oil" of piety and the fear of God will have nothing to fear later.
source: ELDER PAISIOS OF MOUNT ATHOS - SPIRITUAL COUNSELS "WITH PAIN AND LOVE for Contemporary Man", Part 3, Chapter 3, Holy Monastery "Evangelist John the Theologian" SOUROTI, THESSALONIKI, GREECE
